Since getting out of the hospital, I had been waking up before the sun. For half an hour or so, I would sit outside in the near dark, still and peaceful, and watch the sky change. As I sipped my first cup of coffee, the sun slipped into the day as black became royal. Then a hint of gold and orange would appear right before the sky turned a brilliant light blue and filled with the huge cloud shapes that only a flat landscape and a humid climate can create. The breeze stirred the plants around the pool, and I would hear the muffled sounds of Alice making breakfast, little clinks of spoons and the soft whoosh of the refrigerator opening. This scene is supposed to help me relax and be introspective.