December 14, 2012; Eleven Days Until Christmas
A picturesque day
in Newtown: scattering
clouds danced joyfully,
making playful shapes,
monkeys and rhinos
followed the children
from car to classroom.
Sun rays shone warmly
above, soon to reveal
the twenty-six halos of
innocent souls.
A thousand miles away,
our day is much less bright;
no animals lead us
to classrooms, instead
school buses lead us out.
Noon—we watch in awe,
in disbelief, in silence.
No words would be enough.
I think about the grins,
their potential and unmet dreams;
I ponder on the valiancy and
the senselessness of everything.
One year passes, then three, then six,
but what time is meant to erase and
fix and overcome, prevails and
strikes once more and once more and
once more.
In all the years and all the clothes,
the gray t-shirt and jeans you wore
as twenty-six entities departed
will never leave
your memory.
February 14, 2018; A Sunny Day
Six minutes changed everything.
Six minutes made Valentine’s Day a dreaded date;
made Ash Wednesday feel unholy.
Six minutes cut lives short; left families etched
with undeviating emptiness.
Six minutes produced heroes like Peter Wang
who risked everything for strangers and friends.
Six minutes left three children fatherless
and one fiancée with nothing but an unworn dress.
Six minutes took four seniors, months away
from new chapters, away from their dreams.
Six minutes took away the next step
of seventeen people’s lives.
Six minutes stripped joy away from survivors
and instead filled them with unfair guilt.
Six minutes created years
of tears and grief.
Six minutes manufactured
“thoughts and prayers” across the country.
Six minutes jump
started a call to action.
Six minutes changed absolutely nothing.
We’ve Seen Too Much
We are the post-Columbine
generation; we have never
seen the before.
We’ve only heard names
of victims and watched
countless variants of the
same story unfurl.
We grew up overly cautious,
filled with fear, and
double thinking every
action as drills taught us
to survive.
We were raised to have
a plan, to look for exits,
learn basic aid;
show kindness to
everyone, never be cruel—
you never know who’s
watching.
The blonde one
had a list; would he
have tried if he’d
gotten the chance?
Could you have
recognized the signs?
Would you have
even made it through?
We’re different people
who’ve lived versions of
similar lives; younger
years were filled with
questions with no answers,
but in our adult ones,
we’re finally finding
power—checking boxes
will one day change the
outcomes of the world.