Failed her
I failed
her. Was not
good enough because
no one can ever be
good enough to carry
the burdens of the
dying on their backs, to
be blessed with the
baggage of existential
emotion that makes life so
sweet as to make it unbearable
and the dying is a welcome
friend willing to end the
disintegration of the soul into
the sickening sweetness
and replace it with the cool
breeze of nothing. No one is
good enough for the one reaching
out of the blinding light and
clear darkness, reaching into the
world of the living while surrendering
to whatever might lie
beyond. I failed her because I
could not understand. Could not hold
her hand in a way that means anything
more than pressure on the nerves.
But no one
could.
Ashes to Dust
Be ashes rather than
dust. For the function
of man is not to
exist it is to live. And
that living is up to
him for the universe
is ultimately uninterested
in his existence.
But what is the
difference? Exist
is to have an objective
reality. To be in a way
that is fact. Live has
more meanings. Can
mean to have an exciting,
fulfilling life.
Fulfill is to
satisfy a condition.
Bring to completion.
Exist. Be real
in a way that
cannot be denied.
Live. Bring to
completion this
project that is
humanity.
Exist. Be.
Live. Art.
I rather be
ashes. and
dust.
Broken
I broke on
Friday night.
Wednesday
morning. A
Monday after
noon.
The dictionary calls
the word archaic.
old-fashioned. An
outdated way of
breaking.
a verb. Meaning
to become inoperative,
to put an end to,
to pause, to stop
oneself, to
fail, to crush
the emotional
strength, destroy
the effectiveness
of.
on Friday night.
Wednesday
morning. A
Monday after
noon.
I did the old
fashioned
thing. And
stopped.
paused. Put
an end to
movement.
Allowed room
for being
human.