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Jim Cavan
Jim Cavan is a freelance writer whose work has appeared at Catapult, The Nasiona, Sports Illustrated (SI.com), ESPN.com, the New York Times, Bleacher Report, Grantland, The Cauldron, and SB Nation, among other outlets.
Fathers
As I rocked with Rett the morning he was born, hoping to spark his first earthly dreams with whispered oaths to give him all I have and know, his fatal cancer still an unseen demon in his cells, I thought now and again on what I’d say to my own dad and damn near cried every time. It stemmed partly from the pride of new fatherhood, of the blue eyes and late-April birthdays our trio would share and the laughs and campfires and straight-up Manhattans to come. And then this inflective twinge that I’d never feel further from life’s nascency, from unremembered youth, as I did just then, not even at my deathbed goodbye.
Issue 22, February 2019
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